Dear Reader,
Corfu was exactly what I needed. We haven’t been on holiday for 2 years due to Stu’s extra study ( which he crushed! ) so the second my feet hit greek soil I just melted away. I always take way too many sketchbooks, notebooks and proper books to read. I see the week beside the pool and envision myself in a blind panic with nothing to do. I take work “just in case” or sometimes I’m even guilty of seeing the week as a way to catch up with lagging projects. My Holiday!!! But, after the first 24 hours there under the sun the same thing always happens. I melt. I end up listening to music and relaxing in the sun and eating my own body weight in bacclava. It was perfect.
Of course the second I get back home my Iphone breaks, I get the worst migraine I’ve had in years and I can’t even bring myself to tell you how much fat I’ve put on, mainly because I’m too afraid to weigh myself, that’s a tomorrow problem. For today though I follow what I do most Sundays, I recover, reorganise and redirect myself. There’s a huge mug of tea to my left and I’m half watching a Netflix series about 18th century warring brothels ( Harlots ). I love the costumes and I’m certain to steal a few ideas from them for my sketchbook.
This last month I’ve definitely had a little burnout. Just because I enjoy everything that I do doesn’t mean that it doesn’t feel like work to my body. I started to get lethargic, blurry around the edges, anxiety began to rise and then the headaches. This stage in my fatigue is all formulaic at this point. Now that I’m back from my rest I feel like myself again and ready to get clear on my next step.
I love a “Winter Arc”. It’s a way for me to get started on my new years resolutions early. It’s also a way for me to take a look at what I have tried to accomplish this year and haven’t. If its still important to me then it goes on the list again for next year. If it’s not then I didn’t really want to do it in the first place. I no longer treat my lists as “successes and failures”, just invitations to ideas that, at the time, align with joy. If they don’t align after a year then, the idea itself may have just been a stepping stone to something else. My job is to catch the idea and let it grow. Sometimes it grows within me. Sometimes it’s just catching a ride onto the next person.
I am careful though not to use this way of thinking as an excuse to not complete what I set out to do. Some things are clearly important to me as a person and those I do my best to stay on course with. Time with my husband, working out, making art, making music, making books, showing up for my spiritual life are all non negotiable s. It’s the million and one little projects and ideas that I wrestle with. These are the things that I have trouble prioritising. I list them because I am so aware that sometimes the most incredible things in my life have been birthed by small curiosities. So I indulge, at least in the idea, and then if I can fit it in I will. I give myself a year to play and if it’s not for me, I let it go.
This week I have a lot of journalling to do. A lot of catching up to do. For today though, its just me and a deep breath in after two weeks off before I start work again. I am excited about what I can get started before next year!
What would you do for your Winter Arc?
Have a good week
Big love
Ryan x